Race Problem: Picking the winner.
Rage: The punishment we inflict on ourselves for someone else’s fault.
Range Anxiety: You’re on the range, but the stupid cows won’t tell you how to get back home.
Rantipole: An angry resident of Warsaw.

Rampage: The age when you need to look for the angles.
Rapture: What sister Nancy did to your knuckles when she caught you chewing gum.
Rash Decision: When you thought it was a good idea to shortcut through the poison ivy.
Rash of Good Luck: The consequence of one’s ability to distinguish between the shamrock and the poison ivy.
Rasputin: Evolutionary progenitor of the Vladputin.
Reality: Often the most difficult tea to swallow.
Redaction: The act of xxxrxing xxx document xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx process xxxxxxxxxxx truxx xxxxxxxxxxxx readable,a necessary step in ensuring that sensitive information remains xxxxxxx while still conveying essential messages.
Rebar: When Falstaff kicks you out and you go over to Maggy’s.
Rectitude: The formal dignified bearing adopted by proctoligists.
Rebate: Tireless extension of debate.
Recorder: The opposite of wreak havoc. – Wiley’s Dictionary
Recourse: When the first curse is insufficient.
Rectitude: The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
Redress: After you spill the lasagna on your lap.

Reflex: When she doesn’t notice the first time.
Region: A specific definite space as distinguished from any other specific definite space.
Regret: a. Post-event understanding.b. when the first gret doesn’t get you out of the doghouse.
Relative: Everything is relative, except the statement itself, about which we have absolute certainty.
Relative Humidity: The sweat that breaks out just as your relatives are coming for dinner.
Relies: Statements provided to clarify former explanations.
Religion: A system of beliefs, varied in specifics, yet collectively valued for the recruitment of cannon fodder.
Rely: When you realize you’ve been caught in the first one.
Remiss: What you say before “third time’s a charm,”.
Remorse: a. Soul searching preparation for a subsequent offense. b. When more morseis mandated.
Renegade: Any excuse to get you out of the promise.
Renovation: The process of creating new problems to solve the problems caused by previous renovations.
Reparation: Satisfaction for a wrong, regardless of from whom it was obtained.
Repartee: After party party.
Repast: Pathetic attempt to escape the future.
Repose: a. When the first picture isn’t good enough to capture the moment. b. When the first pose reveals too much adipose.
Reprobate: When your closet cousin contests the will.
Repulse: What usually shows up after the quad shot.
Reputation: The bubble a man bursts when he tries to blow it for himself.

Respite: When just getting even is not enough.
Resurrection: a. What you may have been hoping for when you asked for Sildenafil. b. Splurgeons recommend this 8 shot espresso drink. Cream and sugar to taste. Should dezombification not occur, RUN AWAY!
Resuscitation: Four shot splurgeon recommended espresso drink. Cream and sugar to taste. Should subject remain blimp, see Resurrection, above.
Retailer: What fluffy needed after a close call with a lawn mower. – Wiley’s Dictionary
Retreat: When doggo just won’t stop his begging.
Revenge: When just venging isn’t enough.
Review: The real reason you kept the centerfold.
Revile: When your first invective is insufficient.
Ridiculosaurus: Silliest animal of the Silurian Era, a whimsical reminder of the bizarre creatures that once roamed the Earth.
Riot: Peaceful demonstration to redress woke infractions, with the added opportunity of free TVs.
Roborant: You should not have made Hal angry.
Rocky Mountain Oysters: The original sack lunch.
Romaines: Those little bitty pieces left on your plate that are too awkward to stab with your fork, a testament to the stubborn remnants of an unfinished meal.
Romantic: Amorous burrowing insect.
Room and Bored: When you can’t afford the extra charge for internet.