Damage: You start noticing at forty, maybe fifty. . . It gets worse
Damaged: The place where you have 2 choices, and you pick the one that gets you home by 9 o’clock.
Day: The period of time assigned for each eon of the creative periods as designated in holy writ. We need not be troubled by the uncertainty. It helps us understand why the seventh day is yet to be recorded as having ended. Certainly, this buoys our hope that God will declare at the end of this day as he had for the first six, that “it is good”.
Death: The final eviction.
De-Banking: Cause for De-Bunking the stooges of SNL. – January 2024
Debased:De Facto, after having been exposed to social justice.
Debasement: De best place for storing old sports equipment, forgotten projects, and surgical mistakes.
Debate: What you put on de hook to catch de fish.
Debater: When you decide to argue with your girlfriend. . . Don’t bother. You can’t win.
Debrief: Remove undies
Debriefing: One of the terrors of freshman orientation.
Debunked: Without a bed to lay on.
Defaced: Banned from Facebook. – Wiley’s Dictionary
Defame: a. To lie about another. b. To tell the truth about another.
Default: De same mistake you made before.
Defective: Cop with handicap
Defenestration: Time-tested method of honoring the clergy.
Delegation: “As Flies to wanton boys are we to the gods.” –Shakespeare
Degrade: What you got on the final because you fell asleep during the all-nighter.
D.E.I. Didn’t Earn It.
Deja Poo: The awareness of having heard this same old crap before.

Delivery: A lot like liver, and not any better with bacon and onions either.
Delusion: Matured illusion.
Denisovans: A bipedal species, formerly disregarded in the real of Homo Sapiens. Recent discoveries of their intelligence and creativity, along with DNA evidence, have unsettled modern intellectuals, forcing them to confront their long-held biases and assumptions about human ‘evolution’.
Dentist: Collision repair Specialist.
Dentures: Substitooths
Deontology: Where the ends justify the means.
Departed: Where the comb went after the hairline ran off.
Deplorables: Those ignorant degenerates who refuse to accept my brilliant plan.
Depresso: A sad cup of coffee.
Derangement Syndrome: A complex mental disorder, affecting a cross-section of social groups, each with the immutable conviction the others are determined to destroy all that is good and pure, the lack of cohesion threatening to collapse the image of our history.
Descent: De olfactory experience. Particularly, de fragrance you call to mind when considering the sound of this word. See also, Ascent.
Despair: What got you home after de Flat.
Detailed: Why Sylvester was angry when Tweety slammed the door.
Devastation: Where Karen waits for the bus
Di-agnostic: To expire without ever believing in anything.
Dictionary: a. A malevolent literary device for cramping the growth of a language and making it hard and inelastic. This dictionary, however, is a most useful work. – Ambrose Bierce – The Devil’s Dictionary b. A collection of words with definitions assigned by self-appointed experts. Our dictionary, on the other hand, represents the current state of reality.
Die: To stop sinning.
Diphthong: Extremely skimpy swimwear.
Disambiguity: Not that ambiguity.
Disasterbate: When you can’t stop thinking about all the worst possible outcomes.
Disdain: On your shirt after the lasagna.
Disgruntled: Porky with a speech impediment.
Disquietude: a. When you had so much fun at the staff picnic and now HD wants to talk to you.b. Like when you unplug your hearing aid.
Dog: Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read. – Groucho Marx

Dogma: A hard substance commonly found in soft brains.
Dogmatism: Formal worship of man’s best friend.
Dogwood: Recently discovered tree species.
Dominant: The aunt you do not want to pick a fight with.
Dopamine: He may not be so bright, but he’s still my friend.
Dormant: The ant who found your messy room at university, gets his degree, follows you home, and brings his family.
DUI: What you got for the penny you put in your mouth before the breath test.
Dunning-Kruger Effect: a. The state of being fictional when you believe you are functional.b. Where anything is possible when you don’t know what you are talking about. c. When the amateur meets reality.
Dystopia: When the Dunning-Kruger amendment becomes law.